The swine flu armageddon-a-thon is over and I've returned just in time for the Memorial Day weekend. In case you were wondering, I had a prolong bout with brain AIDS - completely unable to write about anything indecent and anecdotal. But seriously, things have gotten ridiculous. To the point of being really ridiculous.
Like Dick Cheney praising the positive effects of torture. Seriously? Surprisingly enough, Dick Cheney was not nominated for any Christian WWJD Awards. You would think such a staunch Republican, a party which by the way comes off as the gay lover of all things Jesus, would try to be a little more... Jesusy. Basically the former VP is saying that the ends justify the means. Torture a guy to get information. Because that's what Jesus would do. No, really, he would. Seriously.
And what's all this ish about Jon and Kate cheating? OMG he's cheating on her!! Um...omg...are you really that surprised? Seriously? Have you seen the show? It's like he married a combination of Martha Stewart, Octo-mom, and Hitler. His wife is a condescending, type-A, control freak psycho. He has EIGHT kids running around. He has no time to get away and hang out with his bros, watch the game, and drink a beer. Dude has been totally broken. Seriously.
One last thing: I will never understand DC's fascination with pandas. Especially the hype surrounding the unsuccessful forced artificial insemination tactics employed by the folks at the National Zoo. I'm sorry, but if a species doesn't even want to repopulate, that's fine by me. What have pandas ever done for us anyway? I've been to the zoo. They just sit there and eat bamboo. BFD. Unless we're talking about Sexual Harassment Panda. That dude was cool. Seriously.
