Oh, Marion Barry. What do you have that makes D.C. so into you? It was nearly two decades ago when we all witnessed your glorious crack-smoking wonder years. Life was so much easier for you back then. Until it all came crashing down one starry night at the Vista Hotel where your ex-girlfriend-turned-FBI-informant ratted you out to the Feds in an undercover sting.
So after you get out of prison from your drug charges, what did you do? You ran for D.C. Council under the slogan, "He May Not Be Perfect, But He's Perfect for D.C." You won with 70% of the vote. Oh, and after you won your council seat, you then ran for Mayor and won.
If D.C. could ever be likened to a prostitute, Marion Barry would undoubtedly be its pimp.
But history has a tendency to repeat itself, and in Barry's case, it's like a bad re-run. So when the IRS investigated him in 2005 for failing to pay his taxes for the previous five years (1999-2004), should we have been so surprised that Barry failed his mandatory drug screening prior to the hearing? Not only did he test positive for cocaine, but marijuana as well. So not only did he violate his probation and receive drug counseling, he was also charged with failing to pay his federal and state taxes. And what heavy sentence did D.C. levy as punishment? More probation.
Did you know a Secret Service officer charged Marion Barry in 2006 with a DUI? Did you also know Barry was acquitted several months later?
But now Barry has gone and gotten a complicated thing like taxes involved in his shenanigans again. Aw snap. Paying taxes on time is tough enough for anyone, but can you imagine how hard that is if you're a cokehead? And a diabetic? And suffering from kidneyitis? I can already tell you what the outcome of any future charges filed against Marion Barry will be. Probation. And maybe a free consultation with H&R Block. For someone elected as a public servant - and being paid by D.C. taxpayers - you'd think residents would wise up by now and get a new pimp.
Face it, D.C., Marion Barry is just not that into you.
Aw snap, indeed! And I know from experience how difficult it can be to live with kidneyitis. I also heard that the doctor said he needed a backyotomy. The fact that the truth reads like a script of a bad made-for-tv comedy movie about the antics of the crazy mayor of AnyGhetto, USA is unfortunate slash hilarious.
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